Thursday, January 20, 2011

The Mouse Fart Chronicles…And Cordovan

It still seems like a good idea…a reasonable compromise. Then there’s always theory versus practice…a twain within which I actually earn my living so you would think I’d know better. But my loden green cordovan shod self practiced it a moment ago and my first pass at actualization didn't go well. In my haste to embrace—my hurry to scriven (scriven probably was but definitely is a word now. Shut up) the old fashioned way…pen to paper…I ordered a Five Year Journal.
Butcept I didn’t take the time to assess the dimensions. It’s a tiny little book and there’s about enough room to write half an ADG’s thumb worth of profundity at best. My handwriting is kinda reflective of the ADD man I am…I can’t write tiny. I don’t think, feel or imagine tiny so this ain’t gonna cut it. I can’t chronicle a mouse fart on the lines provided much less anything else. I suppose an upside to this little vehicle is that I’d never be able to write anything with enough flourish to worry about my mama reading it and then vapor locking on me.
Here’s proof. But I’m not gonna give up on the Five Year Journal idea…It suits me. I just ordered a larger one and we’ll see if its spatialosity is such that I can profundicate suitably. Stay tuned.
Oh, and someone reminded me that this used to be a blog about clothes and shit. So here. Have another take on cordovan…cigar and corduroy.
Patinating nicely I'd say. LFG patinated at nine months. We remain astonished.
And the trousers here aren't just any corduroy swathing. Here's horizontality’s maiden debut for 2011. Rumble strips I imagine them…since they are going sideways. Speed bumps for my britches. And if anyone’s britches needed slowing down, courtesy of a horizonticated vibratory prod, it would be me.
Oh. And there’s cowboy boots here too.

Onwardish. 

ADG II

17 comments:

Young Fogey said...

I like the shoe/sock combo second from bottom. Of course, you had to fuzz it out with them pantaloons. How could you not?

Are the cowboy boots cordovan, too?

Anonymous said...

Give the delicate little 5 YR. to LFG (she will be 16 and leaving you behind in her exhaust) and the BIG MOUTH one for ADG..........perfect

and yes.......you used to write about men's clothing

ADG said...

Fogey of the Young Persuasion...Yep, the shodding/hose hookup was rather clean and tight. Them pantaloons are rather conservative for me ole buddy. Flat front, narrow wale--given that they are sideways--and a subdued (again--for me) color. The cowboy boots ain't nothing but cowhide.

Anonymous...You kinda, in your own little literary technique way, just called me a big mouth. I'm gonna forgive you though, since I just read my morning lesson in my Men's Study Bible and the joy in my heart remains strong enough to preclude saying something snarky to you.

Silk Regimental said...

Funny!

I'm going to find a way to use the word 'profundicate' in some way today!

Etiquette Girl said...

You have cordarounds! They're fantastic and so is your handwriting. it says scads about you.

Upwith Olives said...

I appreciate that it ain't all about clothes, though I did take my first stab at a pair of alden fullstrap in color #8 thanks to you. And Amazon delivered The Art of War (Denma translation) this week.

Anonymous said...

I live for your snark, Baby.

Love the ear-flap-cap on your new profile pic.

ADG said...

Flap Cap AND chin strap. There's a hell of a story there but I remain too traumatized to share it.

OliveUpper...you made my day. Alden full strap eights is a winner every time and the Denma translation is the only one to read.

EtiqutteGirly...scads. Is dat a good thing?

SilkReggie...you ain't gotta hair on your _____ if you don't use profundicate on your boss.

GWS said...

Out of curiosity may I ask where you found a suitably large 5-year journal? I use the one sold at Levenger and it is quite small.

Anonymous said...

Guys guys guys. Get a binder. Get some binder paper. Write the date at the top of each page followed by all of your narcissistic profundication for that date. At the end of the year start over at the beginning of the binder and slip the next year's pages in after the past. This is stuff we learned in 3rd grade, Gentlemen. The Organizational Binderization. Why limit yourself to five years? Hell. You can have DECADES of your own blather. Keep your binders by months of the year so you can track how depressed and mid-life icated yall are in February!

SFBayfurcated

Gretchen said...

Aren't those horizontal cords one of two you picked up last yr? Let's hope the 2nd one is a more ADG-appropriate colour! I've a pair from a few yrs ago in pumpkin and wear them to death. With my cowboy boots. Told ya the 5y journal wasn't gonna scratch your itch but hey, a pithy thought a day is not a bad way to prime your pump, so to speak. Still waitin on the chick shoe post, sir, so prime away...

SouthernProletariat said...

I have to agree with SFBay. Just write.

Go to your local bookseller and pick up a batch of moleskines...they are inexpensive and lightweight. Throw one in your carryon. Keep one in your car. Desk drawer. Wherever your fancy suits you. Heck, tuck one in under those rugs on your patio you never clean.

Then write. And write some more.

DPP said...

ADG -

My first Alden shells arrived yesterday - whiskey full strap loafer.

Here's the relevant question - how do you get any work done after owning these? All I've done today is look at my feet.

Anonymous said...

I recd. the 5 year to you. One line with where and what you did. Maybe odd weather and in your case what you wore. Write small and just factual. The big journals are for your essays. The idea is to look back and compare a single day over a 5 year period. Did you get the one with the space in the back for books read and travels? (not in cleveland anonymous)

ilovelimegreen said...

ADG- If you want to know more about your handwriting, let me know if you want to be introduced to my graphologist friend.

NCJack said...

Why do I have this feeling that once you stop fidgeting in them WTF horizontal cords the mouse will cease to eructate?

ADG said...

NCJackson...you don't know the mices we have around here. Steroids.

LimeGreenie...I don't believe in them people. Too scared of the answers I'll get.

AnonNotInCleveland...My mind is too active for such a small snippet. Even a Cleveland snippet.

DPP...congrats on the Alden shells. The initial seduction will simmer down and you'll settle into a symbiotic connection with the shoes. A connection grounded in more sustainable architecture than just the supernova of animal attraction. And there's no better--sturdier substance to hold true for the long haul than shell cordovan. Damn, that sounded like the Dr. Phil of Shoes Show.

SouthernProle....you and SFBay take all the fun out of an irrelevant problem. And why would I ever clean the rugs outside?

Gretchen...yes, of course, you were correct re the Five Year itch thingy. I've assembled the pictures for the girlie shoe post. Just don't have time to write it yet.

SFBay...mid-life-icated? Damn. That's funny and true and it hurts my ego. Giraffe Man out.

GWS...stay tuned. The replacement one isn't here yet. I'll report on it when it arrives.

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