Monday, March 28, 2011

Cell Phone Holsters...a Nanodiscourse

Holsters...these are good.
This is not.
Don't do it. Nothing says "Presidents Club award winning Regional Sales Manager like Dockers, Tommy Bahama and a piece of digital hardware strapped to your whatever the hell this one is clipped to.
Not good under any circumstance. I don't care who you are.
Imagine strapping this one to your a_s.

Onward. Working from home...the first Monday that I've been home in a month. 

ADG II

17 comments:

Yankee-Whisky-Papa said...

How come they don't make ankle holsters for phones? Or bandoliers for extra batteries? Why not just take the farce to a logical conclusion?

I suppose that holsters are also acceptable if you are an insured and registered contractor, and you know how to accurately swing an Estwing.

Suburban Princess said...

My husband bought one and I promptly showed him a photo of Michael Lohan's strapped to his faded jeans and wife beater...then promptly hid the blasted thing before it made it's way to the garbage bin.

LPC said...

Ha! Even most of the engineers out here know not to wear holsters.

Nelle Somerville said...

Ewww...seriously foul and so totally cheesy I can't bear it.

Main Line Sportsman said...

Thank god the devices have been reduced in size so one can easily keep them in a jacket or pants pocket....avoiding the offenses noted above...Further, these devices are the only time men argue about who's is smaller...

Kent said...

Utility belts don't work unless you're Batman.

lisa golightly said...

Oh no, don't get me started on the Tommy Bahamas and cell holsters. About as pleasing as vertical blinds and root canals !

JRS said...

Ugg...nothing worse. Cell phone holsters are this generations' pocket protectors.

Kathy said...

"the only time men argue about who's (sic) is smaller..." Except for the bad grammar, awesome.

The Duck said...

And how come everyone that has a holster also has an annoying ringtone that's too loud?

Keep them quiet, Hell, just leave it in the car.

Young Fogey said...

What is this "cell phone" of which you speak? What are those arcane contraptions in the daguerreotypes on display here?

ADG said...

FogeyYoungman...there aren't many "contemporary" pictures out in google image land.

The Ducker....I'd vote for "cell phone violation" tickets for using them where others can hear you.

Kathy...don't encourage Main Liner.

Main Liner...size is underrated.

JRS...pocket protectors...damn, that's a throwback.

LisaGoGo...Tommy Bahama stuff is good quality but it's just a little too damn much "Jimmy Buffet" for me.

Kent...Batman and Handy Mannie.

NelleSummer...add a pinky ring and ...

Suburban...that's why he loves you.

YankeeWhiskey...bandolier. Damn you. I've gotta figure out how to work one into my ensemble.

SouthernProletariat said...

The only thing worse that I can think of is the recent trend observed by a few friends of mine. (thankfully I haven't seen it)...women "carrying" thier cell phones in thier bras. Seriously.

Main Line Sportsman said...

Okay okay..."whose"...sheesh...

ADG said...

SouthernProle...I was wondering if all is ok in your realm. And STOP IT. Women are not carrying their phone "there".

Patsy said...

You all better stay away from job sites and boatyards, lest your tender sensibilities be offended by the nextel holsters.

Sarcasm and Cocktails said...

You're bring back bad memories of the guy who painted my house a few months ago. Not only did he have a holster, but the phone within sang out "Hello Moto" in robot voice every five minutes.