And I
intend for this to be as rambling and disjointed as I am this morning. I rolled
in kinda by accident on a honkey tonk in my ‘hood last night after
dinner and stayed till two a.m. You young whippersnappers are surely laughing at
that but for me it was unusual. There’s a basement bar called the Bayou Room in
Old Town that I used to frequent over twenty years ago and back then it was a
little more sedate. And for some reason, while the rest of DC and Alexandria
are pretty much smoke free, this joint and the Basin Street lounge two floors
above it, remain thick as hell with cigar and cigarette smoke.
Here’s
the perverse thing about it. There’s a reason I stayed till two. I loved it. I reveled in the eye irritating haze of smoke and the none too healthy second hand hits I
got from cigars. It reminded me of all the years that I did this kind of thing
every Friday and Saturday night and when smoke was part of the package. And I knew
that my hair, albeit less of it, and my clothes were gonna be thick with smoke
smell this morning. It was just a really fun and safe, given that I drank
watered down vodka tonics in plastic cups one after the other and didn’t have
to drive home. And let me confess this…I danced nonstop for at least an hour.
And I’m talking loud head banging music about which I knew nothing. There was
no music in the mix that was remotely elegant or crisp or civilized enough to
render the shag an option. This was primal body wigglin’ stuff and my whitey
whitey white can’t dance self was right in the middle of it. It’s not the
beginning of a trend. I might not ever do it again but I sure had fun last
night. My ears are ringing and my smokey head hurts.
Ok, on
to sartorial stuff. It was a joke, folks. I stated on my tumblr that I was
taking a portion of my shoes to the thrift shop in Old Town. Don’t go,
they won’t be there. I had them out for a couple of reasons. I am going to get
shed of a few pairs but I already have folks who wear my size who are usually
willing to transact some second hand shoe business with me. And I’m also
pondering what I can go ahead and pack, even though I know not where yet, I am
going to land in the Bethesda Chevy Chase area. Additionally, I’ve still got
tons of work to do on my place to get it ready to rent.
Yes, it
seems that I’ve accumulated a ton of shoes. And there’s another pair of
Cleverley bespokes in the works as well as an absurd mongrelizationated green
shell cordovan boondoggle gestating presently at Rancourt. It’s gonna be a bell
ringer one way or another. And the Cleverley 2.0 effort? Suffice it to say that
you should go ahead and practice tisk-tisking now. Two eyelet suede Dainite
with tasselled shoe strings in a suede color that you’ve never seen before.
Also,
here’s a tragedy for me and an opportunity for someone else. My suede Edward
Green Westminister Dainite Double Monks…Dainite
Double Monks…sounds like either a Franciscan or Jesuit clique or one of the
bands whose songs I wiggled to last night. My Westministers that I’ve worn
maybe a half dozen times after waiting nine months to arrive are too big for
me. And it’s my fault therefore my only recourse is to sell them. I insisted on
a larger size so I own the mistake. I did not listen to my expert guys at Sky
Shoes and demanded the size without appreciating the difference in the last. So
instead of a perfect 8-D U.S. which is what I needed, I got a perfect 8.5-D
U.S. If you are an 8.5-D and you want these, shoot me an email.
They are
just too nice and too unique for me to try to live with them avec an innersole
or some other compensatory manipulation. Check the retail price of Edward Green
Westministers at Leffot or Leather Soul and then add a hundred bucks to that
number for the special order/Dainite option and you’ve arrived at what I paid
for these. Do not email me and jerk me around with some bullshit offer. But
please, if you want them, shoot me an email at maxminimus2000@yahoo.com . They are essentially brand new and I’ll be
willing to let them go at a hefty reduction and if you are in the contiguous 48
states, I’ll cover the shipping. Just make sure you wear an 8.5-D U.S. because
once they arrive at your house, they ain’t coming back to mine.
The most
daunting packing task ahead is wrapping and packing the small fortune in lead
toy soldiers that are guarding this joint. Someone remarked about all of the
artwork and the aggravation associated with taking all of it down. That’s easy
breezy compared to the old and fragile lead soldiers.
My
latest addition…I don’t know what happened to my spending lockdown…is a partial
set of the hard to find Heyde Polar Exploration Team. I remain amazed that any
of this stuff survived. I had plastic “army men” when I was a kid and we
freakin’ destroyed them.
Surprise
I know but I don’t give a damn how nerdy my hobbies appear to others. I am completely
fascinated with antique, as well as some of the modern lead soldiers. But it is
a nerdy hobby. I’ve taken some comfort in knowing that Douglas Fairbanks Jr.
had a massive collection for years. So did Malcolm Forbes as well as artist
Andrew Wyeth. That’s Sam Torode above, in Wyeth’s studio surrounded by Wyeth’s
little lead legions.
I got a
kick out of discovering the following passage in the Andrew Wyeth biography
that I’m currently re-reading amidst an obsession with the Wyeth clan and their
Chadds Ford lives. Andrew Wyeth reflects on being newly married to Betsy…a
nineteen year old gal and he only three or so years older. “Wyeth remembers…We were absolutely broke. Best thing for us. We’d go
to a movie and spend twenty-five cents for dinner. We started out with an empty
living room, a stove, icebox and a lot of toy soldiers.” It was obviously a
good start. When Wyeth died, he and Betsy were in their sixty-ninth year of
marriage.
And
Heavy Tweed Jacket asked me over at my tumblr if “there really are toy soldier
swap meets?” Well, they aren’t swap meets per se…they are called Toy Soldier
Shows. There’s a huge one each year in Los Angeles, Chicago, New Jersey, the
Philly area, two in DC and a couple in London. There are also specialist
auctions several times each year. I remember taking LFG to one when she was
about four years old and she thought the “show” was going to include a
performance of toy soldiers. She wasn’t too crestfallen and I think we both got
a chuckle out of her misconception.
But
sartorially, toy soldier collectors are walking disasters. Keep the nerd
variable in mind. Here’s the visual evidence to support my point.
Also, I’m
probably one of the youngest collectors and it worries me on a couple of
fronts. The older guys with plenty of dough and memories of actually playing with
lead ones, keep the market for the better stuff rather high. Mass produced
plastic soldiers, coupled with concerns about lead toxicity, essentially wiped
out the commercial appeal of lead ones by the mid-1960s. I also fear that as
the older guys start dying off, the market will plummet…at just the time when I’ll
need to start selling off my stuff to pay for LFG’s sorority dues. Life’s risky
ain’t it? But hell, its risky leaving the house looking like sport model
soldier collector guy above, no? So the
shows are fun and I always buy something. And I always remain cognizant that I’m
the only guy who’s ever worn Belgian shoes to the “Show.”
Final
word on shoes for today…My Trad-Ivy Tuesday will actually arrive on Tuesday. It’s
already written and in the queue. Scary I know. I’ve finally taken up the task
of a full report on my Cleverley dealings over the past year. That’s Cleverley
above. Brown shell cordovan. Arriving in August at Leather Soul. Can you image
how incredible the patina is gonna be on this number after a couple of years? I’ve
said it before…if you can’t see art, talent and God in something so sublime, I
worry for you. But don’t worry for yourself. Because I see the same things in
hand painted lead toy soldiers.
Ok. I’m
done. It’s off to the shower to rid myself of bar smoke. I’ve got a lunch date
with LFG. She no longer stays with me on my LFG weekends so lunch is the best I
can wrangle. These next however many years are gonna kill me. I don’t regret
one bit of the investment I’ve made in this child. But I can say unequivocally
that I’ve invested in a way that’s left me unprepared for this current phase.
The “she’ll come back to you” statement that everyone who’s already trod this
path offers me lands logically on my rational self and falls into nothingness
when it touches down on my heart. But please realize that I’m not wallowing in
it too much. I’m taking action to adjust to this new and healthy next chapter
in LFG’s journey. And I remain mindful of how blessed I am to have a healthy
and happy child...who only grunts at me.
Onward.
With shoes. And soldiers. And a head/heartache.
ADG-Two
16 comments:
Coming back from Myrtle Beach yesterday, I passed "South of the Border". Had to chuckle thinking of you and LFG and the plastic big hair.
I'm sure she does as well.
Max, I would like to give you a little house warming present for your new Chevy Chase/Bethesda nest. Once you get settled, just let me know. Heck, I might even take up a collection from your stalkers. Whadyathink?
http://www.californiaclosets.com/node/25896?render=shadowbox
-Flo
That Crystal Geyser Bottled water? .... from South Cackalacky!
James...you were 20 minutes away from my mama. Shoulda stopped in to say hey!
Flo...I'll take it.
AnonGeyser...You lost me.
Did I tell you that I saw the Polar exploration team figures in a glass case at an alumni reunion function recently? I believe that there was a seal and a walrus and a fur-clad man aiming a rifle downwards. I cant remember if there was a polar bear or not.
Impressive shoe collection, just how many pairs are there? I was also wondering do you keep any of them in those nifty cloth bags they give you when you buy a good pair of shoes?
Do you drive a blue landcruiser? I think I saw you pull out of the gas station on South Washington on Saturday. If so, I am a little bit embarrassed that I can identify bloggers.
AnonBlueCruiser...Nope. For now at least, I drive a British Racing Green Mini-Cooper S with a green convertible top. Be not embarrassed.
LeopardMon...I'm scared to count them. I don't really wanna know. Especially since that wasn't all of them. Bags...I keep those very nice shoe bags but I never use them.
YankeeWhiskey...You might have mentioned it. I'll now have fun over the ensuing years, picking up one offs to add to this little incomplete core of Polar guys.
Just as you have me saying "Please take me with you next time you go dancing", you say that you might never do it again. And even though I have been asking how many pairs of shows you have, I am a bit scared now that you are showing these various photos of your shoes...all of them.
Flo- I would chip in if I didn't already have a housewarming present that will knock ADG's socks off.
"Flo- I would chip in if I didn't already have a housewarming present that will knock ADG's socks off."
Like so?
http://www.amazon.com/Sock-EEZ-Remover-Sock-Model-566381/dp/B002BUW0BE
-F
Flo...I clicked on that lank and then guffawed a piece of Vie-eenie and Sprite. You are borderline hatin' on me.
"You are borderline hatin' on me."
Shut up. I love you madly. Lime Green said she's givin something to "knock ADG's socks off." Thassall.
BTW, I'm glad you whooped it up on Saddy night, sounds like a big lot of fun!
Max any chance you can get yourself one them loft-like places? This may as well be my dream house. Doesn't this make you want to cut free from 2/2 bondage:
http://habituallychic.blogspot.com/2011/01/roman-williams-at-home.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+blogspot%2FGcuC+%28Habitually+Chic%29
Love, Ursula Andress
Flo - no, not at all...much to ADG's relief, I would think.
"Flo - no, not at all..."
Oh absolutely, I knew that, I was just kidding around...
At first, I couldn't believe that all them shoddings was yers—and then I saw the second picture.
And that's not even all o' 'em!
What color is that alligator-esque pair next to the green sloops? They look black, but you claim you have no black shoes.
Flo..."2/2" Bondage really does tighten up unmbiguously my housing strategy. And I figger it will till one of two things happen. LFG goes to college or I meet someone before then that allows monogamous cohabitation which would make obvious the need for something other than 2/2. And finally, to answer your question, hell yeah I'd love to have something similar to that visual feast/link you offered me. I'd even go for all of the British Caribbean Colonial bleached bones/bleached sea shells white walls...which is a huge departure from my primary colors...hunter green bedroom...Chinese (or as Reggie Darling calls it..."Retail Red") red hallway.
FogeyYoung'unManMon...those Polo Crocs are dark brown. The photo--iPhone pic--is just dark and shadowy. And I love Will's "sloops" but them green 'uns ain't sloops. They are Edward Greens. Thank you and Good Morning.
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